The Little Things

So last night I went to a Wine-BQ in honor of Eugene's TV show, Popcorn Zen. Eugene is funny, and it was good to see him. It was also good to see several other people whom I had not seen in months (e.g. Kelli Kedis and Vince Vu). This Wine-BQ taught me at least one thing, though, and that is that it is hard to come back home from being away at school without feeling somewhat out-of-the-loop. I already knew that, and I also know that that feeling tends to fade eventually, but never quite completely. While having a conversation with Alex Lipschultz online two nights ago, we discussed that phenomenon of coming home and feeling somewhat disconnected from people you once considered your best friends. It's something I reflect on quite a bit, especially in the larger sense that feeling disconnected from people is just about the loneliest prospect ever. It's something I fear probably more than I should, but I imagine that many people are preoccupied with that train-of-thought as well.

Anyway, on a ligher note, Alex and I also talked about teleporting the other night, and I thought I'd share a bit of that with you:

AJL 45 (12:45:30 AM): I wish I could teleport
yeah laugh it up (12:45:35 AM): hahaha
AJL 45 (12:45:36 AM): that would be incredible, right?
yeah laugh it up (12:45:42 AM): so incredible, in fact
AJL 45 (12:45:53 AM): you could sleep late
AJL 45 (12:45:59 AM): not have to worry about walking or driving to places
AJL 45 (12:46:07 AM): visit europe
AJL 45 (12:46:10 AM): ...or mars
AJL 45 (12:46:15 AM): that would be pretty sweet, right?
yeah laugh it up (12:47:00 AM): yeah, and i could visit everyone on the east coast whenever i wanted this fall
yeah laugh it up (12:47:06 AM): without having to waste time
AJL 45 (12:47:08 AM): yeah, which would be awesome
yeah laugh it up (12:47:16 AM): or money, assuming teleporting would be free
AJL 45 (12:47:16 AM): or you could just show up at Anna's for lunch
yeah laugh it up (12:47:21 AM): haha, yes!!!
AJL 45 (12:47:25 AM): yeah, it would definitely be free

Happy thoughts like that really get me going. Sometimes they are the only things that get me going. And lately, I haven't felt too much like I've been going. Being home is nice, but it makes me feel terribly unproductive. I got the job at Nordstrom, but I don't really want to take it because it just seems boring as fuck. I want to do something challenging and exciting, but I can't really, or at least I've resolved myself to thinking that I can't. The problem is that there are so many things that I want to do and yet I have no idea how to go about doing them, and I'm scared to take a shot in the dark and try. Realizing that I have nothing exciting to write about in this weblog only makes me feel worse about how little I'm doing with myself right now, and I know I've been home less than two weeks, but the future doesn't seem all that much brighter. I do have Bloc Party with Angela on Saturday to look forward to, though. It's the little things, always the little things...