HOLY SHIT!!!

Oh, shit! Oh, shit! Check this out, bitches! This is out of control! I made a post on Craig's List, offering my services as a babysitter/tutor/personal assistant/college counselor. I got a few responses almost immediately, including the following from a husband who needs someone to look after his 12- and 14-year-olds and perhaps travel with his family between their two homes in Orange County and Vegas on occasion. Sounds totally harmless, right? Check this shit out:

Original e-mail from X-Man:

My wife and I have tried three assistants since our main girl of 3 years moved in May but none have worked out. [Name of assistant] had spoiled us. We are interviewing again this week. You sound perfect. We have houses in Orange County and Las Vegas so there is some travel. Two kids, low maintenance, 12 and 14. Send resume and picture immediately!

Second e-mail from X-Man:

[Name of wife] is leaving for her new job in Las Vegas Saturday so we’re seeing as many assistant applicants as possible. How many hours per week?

Sounds pretty standard, yes? So, I respond with a little more information about myself, and I attach a resume and picture because, even though I'm not wild about employers who ask for you to submit a picture, there are definitely some who do, so it's nothing be alarmed about.

Now, the third e-mail from X-Man brings the twist:

How open minded are you? We live a rather wild lifestyle.

Enter intrigue. Wild lifestyle? What kind of wild? I mean, I would say that my family leads a pretty wild lifestyle, so I'm trying not to think anything of it. Nonetheless, I need to be cautious about the way I respond to his e-mail. I don't want to sound narrowminded, but I also don't want to open myself up to something...dangerous? [Gasp!] So, I reply with the following:

Haha...I mean, I'm pretty open-minded. I'm not sure what you have in mind, but I imagine I could probably handle it. My mom has 4 poodles, and if you ask me, that's about as wild as it gets. :)

Cute. Clever. I'm okay with my answer, but now I'm eagerly awaiting his response, as he was quick to respond to my other e-mail.

Fourth and most recent e-mail from X-Man:

Really. [Name of wife] is just a nympho and I guess I am too. She does a lot of entertaining.

Whaaaaat? WTF? This is not at all what I was expecting!!! I mean, I certainly entertained the notion that this man's wife, moving out to Vegas and all, could potentially be a showgirl. But the fact that he responded so forwardly is just really fucking weird! The strangest part is that I don't think he's trying to proposition me or anything; he seems legitimately interested in finding a babysitter.

So now what? Do I respond back and say, "Is this a babysitting job?" Do I tell him that I don't mind because...I'm a nympho, too? (That was a joke.) Or, do I just ignore it altogether? I mean, tell me this isn't really fucking bizarre!

WHAT THE FUUUUUCK?

Funny

See what it's all about.

Also, what is this, and why did I randomly find it on the stairs in my house? Noone seems to know who this woman is, and what's especially curious is that the picture appears to have been torn out of a photo album since it's attached to a picture of my grandfather on the back side.

Also, I'm getting extremely sick and tired of my hair. I sort of want to change it up, but I'm afraid to do anything terribly drastic. Suggestions?

Oh, Shit!

How could I forget to mention the fact that last night, whilst playing Pit at M. Boese's house, we fucking jammed to Yanni - Live at the Acropolis. Haha, bitches! You are so jealous! I am not joking when I say that I plan on swiping that album from my mom's CD collection so I can play it in my car. ALL THE TIME.

Matin and I have also devised a plan to represent Yanni (both in his manhood and infancy) on the Facebook and MySpace respectively. I'll let you know of our progress in that arena. Maybe I'll even "friend you." Errr, maybe Yanni will friend you! Haha, yes!

Oh, and motherfucking Average Joe premieres tonight. The piss is already dribbling down my legs because I'm that excited.

Wow, I pretty much have the foulest mouth of anyone I know... Apologies go out.

In Good Company

Today has been mildly productive. In the same vein as Angela Serratore, I shall now break my day's activities up into pros and cons:

• Didn't go for a bike ride this morning as originally planned (-)
• Made eggs and toast for brunch instead (+)
• Dropped off/picked up my prescription at Savon (+)
• Made an unsuccessful trip to Staples to find a new computer desk (-)
• Picked up my paycheck from Nordstrom (+)
• Deposited my paycheck at OCTFCU and signed up to get a Student Visa card (++)
• Didn't get my car washed as I had hoped to do (-)
• Went to Toober's for dinner with Matt (+)
• Got a migraine (-)
• Took some Excedrine Migraine and slept off my headache (+)
• Went to GAY with Matt, Rishi, Jeff, Matin, and Ali (+)
• Played Pit (a card game) and watched Mr. Show with abovementioned people plus Kevin at Matt's house (+)

Overall, that's +9 and -4, which brings me to a whopping +5 for the day. Take that, Angela Serratore!

I am now trying to decide if I want to go to my first class for summer school tomorrow, which actually starts in 7.5 hours. The question is whether or not to take this first class during the first summer session at UCI because I am most certainly going to take two classes during second session. I won't lose money by not going because I will just apply it to one of the later classes I'm going to enroll in. The class starts at 9am, which is pretty rough as far as I can see right now. Ahhh, choices, choices...

Good KNIGHT!

I was supposed to be in bed 2 hours ago...

My only reason for posting was really just to share a few silly pictures with you. The past 24 hours or so have been pretty uneventful; although, I did go to Ikea and Target with my mom today - two events worth writing home about if you ask me. Matt and I also ate dinner tonight at a fairly new Mexican restaurant downtown, where I saw Miss Lea Mannone (one of my middle/high school buds) for the first time since we graduated probably. It's crazy running into people all the time, but it inevitably happens to me almost every single day. (Is it like that everywhere?)

Also, I have decided that one of my all-time favorite episodes of Curb Your Enthusiasm has got to be "The Grand Opening" - last episode of the third season. Go watch it right now because it's pretty much the funniest thing ever.

Also, I hate that I have to come up with "clever" captions for pictures when I post them in my weblog via this silly program called Hello. I already spent an arm and a leg tonight trying to upload pictures and/or link to their direct URLs in my Smugmug photo album, but neither proved any easier than just using this stupid program. This probably makes no sense to you, but I assure you it's frustrating. Moving on...

Tomorrow I hope to go on a long bike ride. I also hope to lose about 5 pounds; however, I'm doubtful that such a thing is possible in the course of a day. Boy, wouldn't that be swell?

Off I go.

G'nite!

Aha, yes...

"My waiting for the bus pose..." - M. Boese

Hmmm...

The man behind the name badge (AKA my father)

I came out to my car to find the following name badge on my rearview mirror.

What a champ (the brother)...

Me and my digital camera carrying case

M. Boese

Stop, Drop, and Roll!

It makes me sad when best friends aren't best friends anymore...

I was just looking through a bunch of pictures (namely Poofs pictures) from my sophomore year at Smith, and the pictures from Middlebury/Senior Banquet/Senior Week made me miss all the good times I've had with certain people who no longer seem interested in my friendship. It's weird to think back on those seemingly invincible connections, having little or no idea how they dissolved so abruptly. I can't even begin to comprehend what the fuck happened to me this past semester. It feels like someone just pulled the rug right out from underneath me, and I haven't been able to get my shit back together since then. Even when I try to focus on individual losses, I can't make sense of anything. I just remember being in an extremely bad place and then realizing that some of my closest allies were nowhere to be found. Honestly, I'm in such a ridiculous mood right now. I should probably delete all of this right now, but I'm feeling so fucking absurd, and I hadn't updated this in a while, so I figured I'd write about it unintelligibly.

I went to a new psychologist on Wednesday. I already have a homework assignment: to write a letter to my dad. I don't have to give him the letter, of course, but I'm supposed to write it as if I were going to. I'm extremely hopeful that, if nothing else, being home for the rest of the year will allow me the time and space to be fully committed to these weekly sessions...which is mildly ironic since being home, I'm sure, will contribute a great deal to my waning mental health...but, no matter how fiercely I try to deny it, getting back into therapy has been a long time coming, and as painful and prolonged as this entire process is going to be, I need it. I just hate the prospect of having to "catch up" a new psychologist on my entire back story, but waiting could only make it harder in the end, so I'm trying my best to come to terms with the fact that I'm making the best possible choice ever by doing this right now.

I hate not being employed, and I hate feeling so fucking lonely and unproductive all the time. It's not as if I don't have friends around; there are plenty of people to play with, and I do my fair share of that, but life has generally just felt very unengaging lately. I feel as if I'm just going through the motions without much thought or effort, and that is really the worst feeling ever.

But everything comes back to me feeling totally helpless and clueless as to why this past semester had to be THE SEMESTER to change the course of the rest of my life - from not graduating on time to having to live at home again (ugh...) to being forced (quite literally) to address several issues I had conveniently filed away for "safe keeping." I really just want to cry right now, but I don't even think I could pinch the tears out of my eyes at this point. I did cry after leaving the psychologist's office on Wednesday - briefly, for about 2 minutes, maybe - and that is the last time I cried in at least 2 months. Isn't that absurd? All of this is absurd, and I'm certain I shouldn't be writing about this in some fucking weblog...but if not here, where?

Meh...I'm tired in more ways than one. I did my "Pilates for Dummies" workout DVD tonight as well as some light weight training. Here's to gaining 10 pounds since, like, April. How much does that fucking suck? Seriously, it's totally going to be gone by mid-July. Totally. I just have to stop eating sugar. Cutting down on my salt intake probably wouldn't hurt either. Yes...

I am trying to enroll in two more classes for the summer - Statistics and Intro. to Psych. I've decided to fulfill the psychology major at Smith according to the new requirements now, which is why I have to go back and take Intro. to Psych. I hope I get into both classes even though I don't really feel like taking summer school (or doing much of anything). I need to busy myself, though, otherwise I am not going to survive the summer. I also need money so that I can visit Mr. Amin in Vancouver as well as some pretty ladies in the NY area.

Ummm...okay...enough. You've probably stopped reading by this point, but if you haven't, congratulations: you're a trooper. Goodnight.

Too Many Zeros

Too tired. Too many headaches. Too unemployed. Too lonely. Too few hours in the day. Too many upsets. Too broke. Too self-deprecating. Too far away from the Smithies I love. Too many poodles. Too much junk food. Too little productivity. Too bored. Too motivationless to do anything about it.

I got out of the shower over 2 hours ago. Why haven't I left the house yet?

The Daily Double

Bullet points regarding the past 24 hours or so:

• Nordstrom has informed me that they overhired for my department - as such, I have been given 0 hours for the next pay period. I have to talk to my manager's manager so they can figure out what they're going to do with me. The better question is what I'm going to do with them. Yes, I am upset about this.
• An American Apparel is opening up in Huntington Beach. Perhaps they will hire me. Working at American Apparel would be so swank compared to Nordstrom; although, the people/philosophy behind Nordstrom are pretty impressive.
• I went to UCLA last night to celebrate the completion of Michelle's third year of college. We went to Acapulco for dinner, hit up a bar next-door (which had the WORST SERVICE EVER) and caught the tail-end of the "Undie Run" in Westwood, an event during which UCLA students run around in their undergarments in protestation of finals. Frankly, after my experiences at Smith College, I was a bit disappointed by the whole event. Needless to say, there are pictures illustrating the evening's happenings in my online photo album. Hit it up, the link's on the right side of this page.
• There was an earthquake today, which puts us at 3 or 4 in California in the last week alone. Cause for concern? Maybe.
• Today Jeff Goodman and I went to Toober's and Sport Chalet. We entered a contest to win this radical pair of new in-line skates that they don't even carry in the store! We also spent a great deal of time discussing how amazing sleeping bags are as well as how awful it is when people so desire to reconstruct their private parts. Haha! Private parts!
• Angela and I missed another meeting today. This made me very sad. I draw hope from the fact that we will most definitely be seeing each other very soon.
• I talked to Alex Weiss today. Of this I was extremely happy. I REALLY hope she comes to California soon (and Allison, too)!
• I consumed an entire package of Extra Winterfresh gum (15 sticks) in less than an hour. That was about 2 hours ago.
• Father's Day is soon. I must resolve myself to finding clever gifts for my clever fathers. Make that #1 on my to-do list tomorrow. (Maybe #2, since I need to inquire about applying to work at American Apparel and figure out what the deal is at Nordstrom.)
• One of my dog's ('scuse me, one of my mother's dogs) ate my underwear tonight. I'm not even joking. Imagine a pair of backless underwear with half the crotch area remaining and you'd have a pretty good idea of what they look like. This puts us at 4 pairs of eaten underwear in 3 weeks. This is becoming somewhat of a problem.
• My cats are so much cuter than yours.

Okay, so long, fare well. It's 12:41, and I might just hit the sack now.

What I meant was...

So, just to clear things up (since many of you seem extremely concerned now about ever being late to meet me), I have no problem with people who are late. I am late sometimes! I was merely saying that it is wonderful when people call to tell you they're running a few minutes behind. I would never demand that everyone be on time everywhere - that's pretty near impossible. I really wasn't even directing this at anyone except maybe a certain person who doesn't even read this anyway. I love you all very much and hope you realize that I will not gut you like a fish if you are ever late to meet me. Likewise, I hope you will not gut me like a fish if I am late to meet you. Thank you.

Water, etc.

Between drinking Propel and water, I've consumed at least 6 glasses of water today. That's probably as close as I've ever gotten to drinking the prescribed eight 8 oz. servings of water per day outside of when I used to drink entire gallons of water as an athlete. Aside from the fact that I have a small bladder, I see no other downsides to this latest development. I'll be sure to keep you posted.

Also, remember how I posted a long while ago about the urgent need for Pillsbury et al to begin marketing single-serving-sized packages of cookie dough? Yeah, well, I can't even believe I forgot to tell you when I saw them, but I did! At Ralph's when I was with Matin, Matt, and Jeff Goodman. (Jeff's extra special, so I refer to him by first and last name.) I just about pissed in my pants when I saw what I TOTALLY PREDICTED! Itty, bitty packages of cookie dough - enough to make 8 whole cookies. Incredible. As a side note, it was also incredible how, during this particular grocery store visit, this lady handing out sausage samples reached out towards the whole lot of us and asked us a bit confusedly if we'd all like a sample of a tequila sunrise. Now, this might not sound hilarious to you, but it was especially hilarious to us since we had to laugh with the woman awkwardly and then allow her to correct herself (which was extremely painful to watch, as she stuttered for a good 30 seconds to get out what she originally intended to say). Talk about a Freudian slip...

I have nothing else to report today except for that fact that I saw Ashley Luth (and several other people whom I hadn't seen in a long, long while) last night. It was her 21st birthday, so Megan, Matt, Jeff, and I picked up a gigantic Snoopy birthday card at Hallmark (which Megan originally claimed was too expensive for her kind even though she was the only one among us with a real job as a high school teacher) and went on our merry way to meet up with Ashley and her other birthday party guests at El Ranchito downtown HB. We headed to Longboard's shortly thereafter and then hit up Cold Stone on our way to Ashley's house. I'll have you know that I didn't eat Cold Stone last night and that I also passed up an opportunity to eat a donut today as well as some New York-style pizza (I opted for something healthier - Life cereal and lemon yogurt). This is all very good and well because I am resolving to cut out the better part of the excessive amount of sugar I consume on a daily basis. I did this last summer and lost weight as a result of it, which just goes to show you how much effing sugar I ingest regularly. Ice cream and candy are the hard hitters, but I'm gonna try it again.

Also, it's funny how I promise to write two or three bullet points all the time and then end up writing a novel.

To end, I would just like to say that I'm really disappointed this whole blonde thing with Lindsey Lohan wasn't a day-long phase. People spend their entire lives trying to achieve a natural redheaded look, and this little lady has the audacity to dye her beautiful ruby locks blonde because she wants to be a towhead? Such a shame...

We'll Take You to the Limit

A few days ago I turned in a job application at a store near my house. The woman working asked me if I was 18 years old to make sure I was legally eligible to take on a job. Do I really look younger than 18?

Because a week ago, I bought a lottery ticket for my dad, and the gentleman behind the counter looked at me with a smirk on his face and said, "Are you sure you're 18?" He proceded to check my ID.

Am I sure I'm 18? Yes, sir, I'm sure that I'm 18. In fact, I'm sure that I'll be 22 in, like, two months. Ugh...not that I'm totally concerned with looking my age, but I'd certainly like to think that people don't pin me as a high school student anymore. I'd REALLY like to think I've come a long way since then; although, it's hard to feel like I've been going anywhere, really, since being home.

I'm usually not a pessimistic person - realistic and mildly cynical at times? Yes. But not pessimistic. Lately, that is all I have been, though. Nothing seems exciting, engaging, challenging... I've barely enjoyed the beautiful weather since being home, and we are talking extremely beautiful weather here - perfectly blue skies, in the low to mid 70s, with a cool breeze coming off the water, which just sparkles this time of year.

We've been thinking about starting up a soccer league. You know, we'd have a set time every week where we'd meet up at a park and kick the hell out of the soccer ball and each other. I think it would be extremely awesome if everyone could make the commitment. It would help get my juices flowing, too.

Speaking of which, I need to start working out again. I've felt so lethargic and unproductive since being home. I've put a lot of thought into it, and I've decided that jump-roping is where I'm going to spend my time and energy to that end. I need a new jump rope, but that's the only thing stopping me. I should hit up Sports Chalet tomorrow.

Matt and I watched The Passenger tonight. I was shocked we found it so quickly. We were convinced we'd have to go to a decent video store in Long Beach to find it, but Jungle Video actually had the Antonioni version we were looking for. I'd tell you about it, but it's still sinking in.

To bed now. Tomorrow will see me taking my dad to the VA Hospital and hopefully purchasing a jump rope along the way. I need to stop eating so much damn sugar. I'm going to be diabetic very soon, I'm sure. Either that or I'll fall over dead from excessive salt consumption.

Where does the time go?

Heart!

Seriously, I am in love with Michelle Sassounian. I have known her longer than anyone else on the planet (aside from my immediate family, that is), and this brings me much joy. Daily. I just got done reading an entry from her Myspace blog, and now I have the warm-fuzzies and a very legitimate reason to smile (something I've struggled to do since being home). Michelle's words:

"one of the things i miss most, however, truly speaking, is the way my daily life included jen. walking/driving to class at 7 am. me running late. talking about our dreams the night before. making fun of each other. copying each others homework. complaining. watching passions at noontime and wishing we were theresa. staying over at each others houses when our own were getting kind of out of hand. coming in without knocking. ordering big new yorker pizza. (so good by the way). drinking diet coke with crushed ice (jen's freezer had a crushed ice option!!). wasting hours upon hours of time together.

really with this girl we always pick up directly where we left off, which is so great. too often i feel completely divorced from people upon reuinting, but with jen its not that way at all. spring break was fantastic, especially when she passed out on the ground in front of the door."

I don't really have much else to say except for "Wow!" After writing an entry the other day that detailed how distant I feel from so many people I once considered my best friends, Michelle reaffirmed the fact that she really and truly is one of my best friends in the whole fucking universe - something that will never change whether we're near or far away from each other. If you are still with me here, I think you should really take this to heart and realize that everyone needs a Michelle Sassounian. She is the best girl ever.

Angela Serratore is also pretty cool. She and I just saw Bloc Party at the El Rey. I had never been there before, but I quite enjoyed it as a venue and hope to frequent it more often. The show was good, but Angela and I agreed that, while each band member was trying extremely hard to do his best, they have a while to go before they sound totally in sync with one another. Nevertheless, it was a good show, and I do love my Bloc Party.

I also love Sunil Amin because, when I asked him how much he benched at the gym today, he said (in a very Napolean-esque voice), "Uhhh...like, a lot, okay?" Seriously, he CRACKS ME UP. If you knew him, this would probably be much more comical.

Anyway, in addition to seeing Michelle and Angela this evening, I also saw Keri Phillips (who Michelle and I walked to and from middle and high school with every day for four years straight), and Sameer Khan, the most beautiful man alive. I do enjoy hours spent with wonderful people, and Keri and Sameer are among them. We all ate at Chili's in Westwood, where some dude and his gf were macking like whoa in front of the restaurant AND where our waitress fucking sucked! She was literally the WORST WAITRESS EVER. No Alex Weiss, that's for sure...

Tomorrow I'm going to Sugar Shack in the AM with some pretty awesome people. For those of you who don't know, Sugar Shack is a local favorite for every meal (but especially breakfast). You know, family run and all that jazz. On Main Street, so you can hear the waves crashing against the sand and such.

It's nice to live on the coast. I doubt I could do it any other way. G'nite.

Sprinkles!

Last night I had a very Curb Your Enthusiasm moment at Great American Yogurt (which we locals lovingly refer to as "GAY"). GAY is a self-serve frozen yogurt joint, and it is run by some friendly Indian people who occasionally get very upset when people make a mess of their topping bar. So there I was, adding a last layer of peanut butter frozen yogurt to my creation (imagine my styrofoam cup perfectly leveled off with an extra hit of frozen yogurt in a lovely swirly cone-shape design on top), when I decided the peanut butter frozen yogurt couldn't go without rainbow sprinkles. I walked myself over to the topping bar and lifted the lid to the rainbow sprinkles. Now, I had to situate my cup very carefully over the topping bin because otherwise I would've spilled rainbow sprinkles all over the place since the last bit of frozen yogurt was unshielded. I scooped up quite the lot of rainbow sprinkles and tipped my cup over to sprinkle away when - all of a sudden - my beautiful fucking peanut butter frozen yogurt swirly cone-shape design on top just fell off into the sprinkle bin. Literally just fell off in one lump!

At this point, I felt very much like Larry David, finding myself in quite the mess even though I really hadn't done anything wrong. I imagined the Indian man would scold me and demand that I leave his frozen yogurt shop while all the other customers just shook their heads in shame, so I carefully stood in front of the topping bar, trying to hide the fact that I had just dropped a huge lump of frozen yogurt into his precious rainbow sprinkles bin. And if that wasn't obvious enough, Matt began laughing hysterically the second he noticed what had happened. I waited for other people to join me at the topping bar so it would look like I hadn't done it, hurried to the register to pay, and dashed out of there without ever looking back.

Needless to say, it was HILARIOUS, but I really did feel like Larry David - so childish, so misunderstood. I'm still convinced people are going to find out about it and forever call me "the girl who ruined rainbow sprinkles for everyone."

And that's really all I've got. Oh, and Radiohead's "Climbing Up the Walls" is a sexy fucking song, my brother, Justin, is the best kid ever, and I am seeing Bloc Party with Angela and Michelle at the El Rey tonight. Jealous? You should be.

The Little Things

So last night I went to a Wine-BQ in honor of Eugene's TV show, Popcorn Zen. Eugene is funny, and it was good to see him. It was also good to see several other people whom I had not seen in months (e.g. Kelli Kedis and Vince Vu). This Wine-BQ taught me at least one thing, though, and that is that it is hard to come back home from being away at school without feeling somewhat out-of-the-loop. I already knew that, and I also know that that feeling tends to fade eventually, but never quite completely. While having a conversation with Alex Lipschultz online two nights ago, we discussed that phenomenon of coming home and feeling somewhat disconnected from people you once considered your best friends. It's something I reflect on quite a bit, especially in the larger sense that feeling disconnected from people is just about the loneliest prospect ever. It's something I fear probably more than I should, but I imagine that many people are preoccupied with that train-of-thought as well.

Anyway, on a ligher note, Alex and I also talked about teleporting the other night, and I thought I'd share a bit of that with you:

AJL 45 (12:45:30 AM): I wish I could teleport
yeah laugh it up (12:45:35 AM): hahaha
AJL 45 (12:45:36 AM): that would be incredible, right?
yeah laugh it up (12:45:42 AM): so incredible, in fact
AJL 45 (12:45:53 AM): you could sleep late
AJL 45 (12:45:59 AM): not have to worry about walking or driving to places
AJL 45 (12:46:07 AM): visit europe
AJL 45 (12:46:10 AM): ...or mars
AJL 45 (12:46:15 AM): that would be pretty sweet, right?
yeah laugh it up (12:47:00 AM): yeah, and i could visit everyone on the east coast whenever i wanted this fall
yeah laugh it up (12:47:06 AM): without having to waste time
AJL 45 (12:47:08 AM): yeah, which would be awesome
yeah laugh it up (12:47:16 AM): or money, assuming teleporting would be free
AJL 45 (12:47:16 AM): or you could just show up at Anna's for lunch
yeah laugh it up (12:47:21 AM): haha, yes!!!
AJL 45 (12:47:25 AM): yeah, it would definitely be free

Happy thoughts like that really get me going. Sometimes they are the only things that get me going. And lately, I haven't felt too much like I've been going. Being home is nice, but it makes me feel terribly unproductive. I got the job at Nordstrom, but I don't really want to take it because it just seems boring as fuck. I want to do something challenging and exciting, but I can't really, or at least I've resolved myself to thinking that I can't. The problem is that there are so many things that I want to do and yet I have no idea how to go about doing them, and I'm scared to take a shot in the dark and try. Realizing that I have nothing exciting to write about in this weblog only makes me feel worse about how little I'm doing with myself right now, and I know I've been home less than two weeks, but the future doesn't seem all that much brighter. I do have Bloc Party with Angela on Saturday to look forward to, though. It's the little things, always the little things...