It's hard to believe...

...that four years ago I, along with a great many of my friends, had just graduated from high school. Even though I have one semester to go, I'm fairly certain that I'm just as worried about job and future as the rest of my peers. With grad school applications approaching much more quickly than I would've presumed, I feel ill-prepared to make the decision that I've apparently been preparing for all my life: What do I want to do with my life? If I go to grad school, should I choose a program in clinical psychology, or should I opt for a degree in education? The former is a commitment roughly five to six years longer than the latter, but I am equally passionate about them both. The other option is, of course, to march straight into a career, which has its appeal, too. Graduating mid-year will be strange, but it will give me a bit of an advantage in terms of getting a job in a slightly less competitive market. I could try my hand at PR in Boston or New York, or I could work at a mental health agency almost anywhere with the long-term goal of returning to school in the same field. Simply put, I can't possibly do everything I want to do...at least not all at one time. There's also the added pressure of having to immediately begin paying off my student loans if I don't enter grad school directly upon graduating from Smith, and my eligibility for receiving a tuition-free education at any CSU or UC school under my dad's Veteran's benefits ends promptly at age 27. This is the point at which I'm regretting not having tried harder at school. I've managed to make it through the majority of my college career with decent grades for not having worked up to my potential, but that leaves me nowhere because decent grades aren't decent enough. It's frustrating that I've put myself in this position, but rambling about it will do me little, if any, good. I just needed to throw that out there, though, as it's what's been occupying my thoughts lately...

In other news, Northampton is quite lovely in the summertime. It's especially lovely when many of your close friends are in tow. Aileen, Sarah, Alex, Lauryn, Matt, Elly, and me have been having quite the time in the valley - throwing BBQs and housewarming parties, going on long bike rides, eating popsicles while being eaten by mosquitos, sweating it out in the humidity, playing ultimate frisbee and soccer, and spending entire days watching Freaks and Geeks on DVD. Aside from having to interrupt the fun for summer school and work, I have little to complain about.

I'm excited to get back to Massachusetts, but I'm sad to be leaving home again. I just got here yesterday, hours before my brother's high school graduation, and I'm already leaving in a couple days. Four days simply isn't enough time at home. I drove along Pacific Coast Highway earlier today and regretted not being able to do that more often. Huntington Beach has its problems like every other city, but I do love it. I miss it, and I miss my family immensely.

Home is where the heart is, suckers. I really, really mean it.